Whether I'm right or whether I'm wrong
Whether I find a place in this world or never belong
I gotta be me, I've gotta be me
What else can I be but what I am
Do you know who you've gotta be?
There are so many times where we often question whether we are the "me" we started off with or not. We go through experiences and come into contact with people who can influence whether we want to be more or less than what we had initially presented ourselves. To fit into wherever you are, do you adapt and change according to the crew that you roll with? As long as you're not being too drastically different, it shouldn't be too bad right? If you need to dramatically change who you are, that's a problem. There is a difference between being professional and being social. People can try and influence you to drop your guard or just be nosey in general about what you like to do to relax or have fun or what you do in your spare time. Whether you're right or whether you're wrong, what are you?
I want to live not merely survive
And I won't give up this dream
Of life that keeps me alive
I gotta be me, I gotta be me
The dream that I see makes me what I am
What have you got in place to help you do more than survive in this earthly realm? We only focus on survival because only by being able to get past having the basics and the fundamentals will we be able to even remotely entertain the hopes and dreams that we have for ourselves. I've been sitting on this blog post for several weeks and normally blogging for me is really easy to do, but sometimes there is just nothing I can do to make the words flow. Sometimes you lose sight of what makes you feel truly alive because you get sucked into what society believes is important for you to have, to possess, to materialise. What dreams are you not willing to give up? There might be people who keep telling you what dreams you cannot give up on - but they don't really understand what you're going through and what pain or trauma you have to live through. They think a few simple words is all it takes to magic everything away. They couldn't be further from the truth.
That far away prize, a world of success
Is waiting for me if I heed the call
I won't settle down, won't settle for less
As long as there's a chance that I can have it all
If you are a person who has worked hard and consistently hard for a long period of time, then it stands to reason that is someone who has had some successes in your time. You might have exceeded your personal best each time and other people might have seen that as you trying to compete with them. That's something I have always hated. You cannot wear other people's insecurities like a cloak anymore. If they feel like they cannot be with you or be near you for fear of betraying themselves, then that's on them, more than it is you. We should be more discerning about how we go about living our lives. There are people who want you to be in their lives but they don't exactly know how to articulate that in their lives. And you might not even know what the right words are, the rights words for yourself about what it means to be in the world. What call are you yet to heed? Maybe you're listening to the wrong calls. Can you really have it all? I guess if you're not willing to compromise yourself in the process - then so be it. You only need to reach out and grab that world of success.
I'll go it alone, that's how it must be
I can't be right for somebody else
If I'm not right for me
I gotta be free, I've gotta be free
Daring to try, to do it or die
I've gotta be me
I went to a fundraising event last night and someone asked me if I was lonely. She wasn't a person that I knew particularly well and it was strange to hear the words, or the question at least, surface from somebody else's lips other than my own mind. She is in a similar situation to me - also a widow - but she, more recently so. She talked about how random people messaged her to pass on their condolences but they were not people who talked to her when her husband was alive. Ah, I said to her. Those would be the people crawling out from under the woodwork. It felt good at least to commiserate with someone who had experienced the same tragedy as me. She talked about just being able to get by, to survive and just live. I thought about her question and I said to her, well no, I'm not lonely, but yes I am alone - despite there being a great network of friends - but yes at times I feel distant from the world I'm engaged in. But realising that made me focus more on what I need to finish.
I'll go it alone, if that's how it must be
I can't be right for somebody else
If I'm not right for me
I gotta be free, I just gotta be free
Daring to try, to do it or die
I gotta be me
I hope that whatever situation you are in, yes you, reading this blog post, that you think first about yourself, not in a selfish way, but think really long and hard, about what you need to do alone. I have seen too many people paralysed by their own trauma and tragedy to know how to pick themselves up and continue living. If the me that I've gotta be means that I cannot rely on anyone but myself to do it, then that's the way that it has to be. People mean well and always try to offer support where they can, but they need to live their lives too and not try to fix your life. The constant challenge remains to think about with a very clear head - what is right for you. We spend too much time trying to be someone for others, when it doesn't actually sit right with the me that we have to be. I don't know how much freedom I will have, other than the free moments of pleasure I have to make sure to have, but all I know is that I must always remember and never forget, that daring to try, to do it or die, I gotta be me. . .
Whether I find a place in this world or never belong
I gotta be me, I've gotta be me
What else can I be but what I am
Do you know who you've gotta be?
There are so many times where we often question whether we are the "me" we started off with or not. We go through experiences and come into contact with people who can influence whether we want to be more or less than what we had initially presented ourselves. To fit into wherever you are, do you adapt and change according to the crew that you roll with? As long as you're not being too drastically different, it shouldn't be too bad right? If you need to dramatically change who you are, that's a problem. There is a difference between being professional and being social. People can try and influence you to drop your guard or just be nosey in general about what you like to do to relax or have fun or what you do in your spare time. Whether you're right or whether you're wrong, what are you?
I want to live not merely survive
And I won't give up this dream
Of life that keeps me alive
I gotta be me, I gotta be me
The dream that I see makes me what I am
What have you got in place to help you do more than survive in this earthly realm? We only focus on survival because only by being able to get past having the basics and the fundamentals will we be able to even remotely entertain the hopes and dreams that we have for ourselves. I've been sitting on this blog post for several weeks and normally blogging for me is really easy to do, but sometimes there is just nothing I can do to make the words flow. Sometimes you lose sight of what makes you feel truly alive because you get sucked into what society believes is important for you to have, to possess, to materialise. What dreams are you not willing to give up? There might be people who keep telling you what dreams you cannot give up on - but they don't really understand what you're going through and what pain or trauma you have to live through. They think a few simple words is all it takes to magic everything away. They couldn't be further from the truth.
That far away prize, a world of success
Is waiting for me if I heed the call
I won't settle down, won't settle for less
As long as there's a chance that I can have it all
If you are a person who has worked hard and consistently hard for a long period of time, then it stands to reason that is someone who has had some successes in your time. You might have exceeded your personal best each time and other people might have seen that as you trying to compete with them. That's something I have always hated. You cannot wear other people's insecurities like a cloak anymore. If they feel like they cannot be with you or be near you for fear of betraying themselves, then that's on them, more than it is you. We should be more discerning about how we go about living our lives. There are people who want you to be in their lives but they don't exactly know how to articulate that in their lives. And you might not even know what the right words are, the rights words for yourself about what it means to be in the world. What call are you yet to heed? Maybe you're listening to the wrong calls. Can you really have it all? I guess if you're not willing to compromise yourself in the process - then so be it. You only need to reach out and grab that world of success.
I'll go it alone, that's how it must be
I can't be right for somebody else
If I'm not right for me
I gotta be free, I've gotta be free
Daring to try, to do it or die
I've gotta be me
I went to a fundraising event last night and someone asked me if I was lonely. She wasn't a person that I knew particularly well and it was strange to hear the words, or the question at least, surface from somebody else's lips other than my own mind. She is in a similar situation to me - also a widow - but she, more recently so. She talked about how random people messaged her to pass on their condolences but they were not people who talked to her when her husband was alive. Ah, I said to her. Those would be the people crawling out from under the woodwork. It felt good at least to commiserate with someone who had experienced the same tragedy as me. She talked about just being able to get by, to survive and just live. I thought about her question and I said to her, well no, I'm not lonely, but yes I am alone - despite there being a great network of friends - but yes at times I feel distant from the world I'm engaged in. But realising that made me focus more on what I need to finish.
I'll go it alone, if that's how it must be
I can't be right for somebody else
If I'm not right for me
I gotta be free, I just gotta be free
Daring to try, to do it or die
I gotta be me
I hope that whatever situation you are in, yes you, reading this blog post, that you think first about yourself, not in a selfish way, but think really long and hard, about what you need to do alone. I have seen too many people paralysed by their own trauma and tragedy to know how to pick themselves up and continue living. If the me that I've gotta be means that I cannot rely on anyone but myself to do it, then that's the way that it has to be. People mean well and always try to offer support where they can, but they need to live their lives too and not try to fix your life. The constant challenge remains to think about with a very clear head - what is right for you. We spend too much time trying to be someone for others, when it doesn't actually sit right with the me that we have to be. I don't know how much freedom I will have, other than the free moments of pleasure I have to make sure to have, but all I know is that I must always remember and never forget, that daring to try, to do it or die, I gotta be me. . .