Skip to main content

Out here on my own. . .

Sometimes I wonder where I've been
Who I am
Do I fit in
Make believin' is hard alone
Out here on my own

When you find it hard to figure out who you are and where you fit in, the likely cause is that you probably don't know who you are because you're busy being all things to all people, and then this is further compounded by you not knowing how to fit in.  Where have you been in your own life?  Consider how much you have grown over the past five years.  Depending on how old you are, how you measure this growth is something that connects solely to you.  We get seduced by this idea of success and what society says it looks like.  Why should we believe any of it?  Why should those markers be what sets our standards?  Maybe being alone is exactly what you need to do to gain clarity.

We're always provin' who we are
Always reachin' for that risin' star
To guide me far
And shine me home
Out here on my own

The more you succeed, you can often find yourself having to be more away from home than ever before.  You outgrow people, you outgrow places.  When this happens people try to be negative about you, they try to bring you down in the hopes that you never reach that risin' start that is actually, only meant for you - and nobody else.  Do people not understand that they all have their own star that they need to grow to reach? We must rise with our stars and move beyond invisible barriers that we think are fixed and limit us.  Who do you need to prove yourself to now?  Who is there left to impress?  What more do they want from you?



While I'm down and feelin' blue
I close my eyes so I can be with you
Oh baby be strong for me
Baby belong to me
Help me through
Help me need you

I don't know how you can deal with people who are in constant need.  Does anybody even know the trials you've had to face?  Can you remember a time and place where once you closed your eyes, you would be transported back to there with who you wanted to be with the most.  Sometimes you can't be strong for other people, theirs is not your fight to take up.  Sometimes they can't be strong for you either, yours is not their fight to take up. But when we know that we need to push people away, all we can do just succumb to that fateful thought, surrender to it and trust in the power of a decision that brings with it an action that would otherwise have been undone.

Until the morning sun appears
Making light 
Of all my fears
I dry the tears
I've never shown
Out here on my own

A lot of friends and family are suffering in silence with their own problems and issues that the world judges them for.  How many more times will you allow yourself to be subjected to abuse? It's no mistake when people say to move up and away from the table when love is no longer being served.  When people say that they are supportive and want to be there for you, but then turn around and use your confidences as weapons to hurt you with - all over again - why let people make light of your fears?  We learn to harden our hearts again.  We learn to never be taken for fools again.  Closing yourself off from the world may work.  But you just need to remember, I can tell you, there's nothing wrong with being out here on my own. . . 

Popular posts from this blog

To be loved by you. . .

To be loved by you is like a breeze Like the summer rain falling through the trees Like the waves that's crashing on the seas, it's easy To be loved by you is like a song Playing in your head you can dance along Like running away with the dawn, it's easy Like flowers bloom, Like my love for you It's been a long time between blog posts. So much has happened since I last reflected about life around me through music. If you have read my blog posts before, then you would know that you are meant to play the YouTube clip (see below) while you read.  I stumbled across this new song that was released today. It's Anzac Day in Aotearoa New Zealand so it's also an opportune time to reflect on the service of our countrymen for peace in previous wars. There is something oddly familiar and comforting about this melody, this song. The whole vibe drew me in and I've always been a huge Emily King fan. Are you currently with someone who helps you feel this way? What is it lik...

Uso song. . .

Sau loa oe, e nofo mai i o'u tafatafa You come now, to sit beside me O le amataga, o si ta mafutaga The beginning, of our relationship O le lumanai o lo'o saunia mai The future that is being prepared  Mo tatou uma e vaai For all of us to see Ou te lē iloa po'o ā ni ou lagona pe a e faalogo i le pese lenei.  Sa faamanatu mai e seisi uo sa ma ola tuputupu a'e faatasi i totonu o le Ekalesia lenei pese.  O se pese sa iloa lelei lava e ia ma sa ou faapea e ese le mālie o le fati o le pese ae o upu fo'i ia, e faamatala mai ai ni mafaufauga o si alii pese ma nisi fo'i o ana ia uso ma le latou va.  E mafai ona e manatua le amataga o si mafutaga ma ou uso?  A ou mafaufau i lo'u to'alua sa oti i le tausaga 2013, ua valavala nei ma ona uso, vaganā lona uso matua sa tau mulimuli atu ia te ia i tausaga e lua i le maliu foi ma le oti.  E lē iloa lava e tatou po o ā foi se lumana'i o lo'o saunia mo i tatou.  Afai e te le o mautinoa po o ā ni fuafuaga o lo...

Masterpiece (Mona Lisa). . .

My eyes ain't used to these rays I'm feeling exposed but I hide no more I can't hide As the sun shines on all of my glory My flaws don't look so bad at all What was I so afraid of? No matter how hard you try to hide, or try to be inconspicuous, it doesn't make a damn bit of difference. Trying to be lowkey when you are on high profile horizons is ridiculous. When your skills, gifts and talents thrust you into the spotlight, you know that you have a responsibility to do your best at all times, because it is no longer about you - it is about who you represent. You might be afraid that your failures and trauma, including your human flaws will all be on display for the world to see - but who has not lived an imperfect life? Why are we afraid of being exposed? Society teaches us to conform and be uniform. Sometimes all we need to do is insist on being comfortable with all our decisions, no matter where they lead us or where we were placed - because our flaws aren't as...