My eyes ain't used to these rays
I'm feeling exposed but I hide no more
I can't hide
As the sun shines on all of my glory
My flaws don't look so bad at all
What was I so afraid of?
No matter how hard you try to hide, or try to be inconspicuous, it doesn't make a damn bit of difference. Trying to be lowkey when you are on high profile horizons is ridiculous. When your skills, gifts and talents thrust you into the spotlight, you know that you have a responsibility to do your best at all times, because it is no longer about you - it is about who you represent. You might be afraid that your failures and trauma, including your human flaws will all be on display for the world to see - but who has not lived an imperfect life? Why are we afraid of being exposed? Society teaches us to conform and be uniform. Sometimes all we need to do is insist on being comfortable with all our decisions, no matter where they lead us or where we were placed - because our flaws aren't as bad as we think they are.
Every part of me is a vision of a portrait
Of Mona Lisa, of Mona Lisa
Every part of me is beautiful
And I finally see I'm a work of art
A masterpiece
I studied Art History when I was in high school and we did examine Leonardo Da Vinci's Mona Lisa. We talked at length about what made this portrait a masterpiece, the aesthetics, the groundbreaking features that Da Vinci focused on in this style and what we learned about the woman who inspired the painting. We might not see what makes us beautiful because we can only see our flaws. When do you think we get to see the masterpiece that we are? How do we shift our negative self talk about ourselves and start to see the positive light that we radiate? We might rely on others to help us convert that negative self talk - but what if they are partly responsible for insisting that you look at your flaws instead? How healthy is a constant focus? Unless you are trying to overcome those flaws, constant reminders of your past mistakes, without doing the work to ensure that they don't happen again, just becomes a moot point.
Who is this I've tried so long to fight
Filling my head with lies that I'm not good enough
Then I heard something in my ear
Tell I'm perfect, not that I know the truth
Time to show and prove
When we fight with ourselves for so long and refuse to see the reality of our actions, then we need to surround ourselves with people who are genuine and able to support us. Doing the character work on ourselves can be hard when you are not in the habit of self reflection and have an aversion to criticism. If you don't know how to hear what other people are saying, it might take a bit of time to try and understand and decipher not only what they are saying about you, but trying to figure out where their words are coming from - a place of love? a place of frustration? a place of pain? Once we figure out where people's words stem from, we start to gain a greater understanding of their choice of words. Sometimes they might not be able to choose their words, but instead they speak freely without filter.
And now I see the pretty colors on my canvas
I'm a work of art, a Mona Lisa
I'll share my picture with the world
Not afraid to let it show anymore
What if you can't see the colours on your canvas? We might need to remember what our colours are. We might need to reacquaint ourselves with our own beauty. We might believe negative opinions of others and use these to outweigh the brilliance of our beauty. On occasion you might share the masterpiece that is you so easily and freely with the world. But what happens when they abuse you? Is it any wonder that you try to hide yourself away and keep your contact limited to only those close few that you hold dear? We might all be in a transition phase at the moment. Trying to find the right moment to come out of hiding and live some time in the sun.
I can light the night. shine so bright
(Let the colors paint my sky)
I can light the night, shine so bright
(There is beauty in my eyes)
I can light the night, shine so bright
(And I can see it now, I beiieve it, I can feel it now)
I can light the night, shine so bright
(Want the world to see, I'm a work of art, I'm a masterpiece)
I can light the night, shine so bright
(I am beautiful)
Where will you shine your light? It might be hard to shine in places where you have previously beein in darkness. People will find it hard to recognise you and your glow. They might have never noticed you before and what you bring to the table and you have only come to their attention now. That's not your fault. That's just you starting to recognise your own beauty. Sometimes I wish people would just leave well enough and learn to understand you by asking the right questions. I have been in the process of learning how to let go - of opinions that do not serve my purpose, criticism that does not propel me into spaces to serve and ill will that shows how alive racism and hate is.
Every part of me is a vision of a portrait
Of Mona Lisa, of Mona Lisa
Every part of me is beautiful
And I finally see I'm a work of art
A masterpiece
I hope that you understand and learn more about your own portrait of a masterpiece. I want to spend time celebrating the beauty of other people's masterpieces and helping in any way possible to contribute to their lives. Sometimes that contribution might need to be space. I have had clear moments in my past where I recognised and knew who I was without a shadow of a doubt. I would like to regain that level of confidence again, perhaps even supersede that. But in order to do so, it requires a steely focus and determination to be real, to be genuine with yourself, so that in turn you can inspire people to "feel" their own vision of a portrait as well. But even though I struggle on a daily basis in so many areas and in so many ways, I finally see I'm a work of art, a masterpiece. . .