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Closer. . . .

Clueless, you got me clueless
See I don't know what it is, but you have it
When you started moving, don't stop moving
Let me get closer to you
Closer to you, closer closer

When have you ever felt clueless?  Having feelings that you can't pin down or explain in any real concrete terms is always difficult.  There is that new phase when you are trying to figure out how you feel about someone and there are so many variables that you have to consider.  You don't quite know how you are supposed to work your way through it (do you even have to?).  There is too much pressure sometimes to try and figure out where you are in that space, where the other person is, and how you are meant to be standing together (or not) in that space.  Are you aware of them moving?  What about their movement attracts your eye?  You might not even know.  All you know is that you just want to be closer to them. And that's ok.

This night is overdue
I can't help myself
One thing I wanna do
Is get closer to you
Closer to you, closer closer

Closer, closer
Come get closer

There will be nights that you think are long overdue.  You might not even be aware that you are having one of those nights until you wake up the next morning and realise that it was even one of those long overdue nights.  We spend a lot of time trying to convince ourselves (or other well meaning people trying to convince us) that we are meant to feel certain things or should be considering feelings that we are not yet ready to claim, not yet ready to acknowledge, let alone accept.  Usually if you are in a good space with someone, they should be able to articulate what makes them happy to be closer to you, to be open to you, to want to be able to admit that any of this is going on.

Foolish, I 'm feeling foolish
Don't usually do this myself
It's a habit
When you started moving
Let me get closer to you
Closer to you, closer closer

You only start to feel foolish about something because you're overthinking your actions or words.  You start to worry about whether you will be misunderstood or misconstrued, so you start to say foolish things that may land you in even deeper hot water or start to do foolish things that are usually out of character for you.  Are we willing to admit when we are foolish?  We fool ourselves into thinking that we can come up with creative excuses that seem inadequate, but because we are kind, we let things slide and we let loose explanations slide to the floor and slink away into some dark corner and we pretend to ignore it.  I've lost count of how many times I have let people not wear their foolishness like a cloak and I've helped people fold their foolishness so that they don't feel like I'm aware it's even there.  Instead I dance and move so that they can start dancing and moving too.



This night is overdue
I can't help myself
One thing I wanna do
Is get closer to you
Closer to you, closer closer

I've been around a lot of different people who have not had long nights or need to have a long night to consider (or reconsider) their priorities.  We sometimes forget to have a little time to ourselves to let loose, to let go of things that hinder us, hamper us, impede us from being the best version of ourselves.  You should be able to reach a point where you can't help yourself.  You should just be  yourself.  There are many sides to you that you should be able to explore and show the world.  I've had lots of conversations with friends about who they think they are and who they think the world thinks that they are.  There is an overwhelming sense of being misunderstood or misinterpreted.  We say all the time that people's opinions of us shouldn't matter - particularly if it isn't true or real.  So what should you do when that happens?  Smile and wink at them I say.  It is always good to smile in the face of cynicism and people who underestimate you.  I mean, they just want to be closer to you right?  That's all that is.

Tell me, do you know what this is?
'Cause I feel like I'm flying, flying
I feel like I'm flying yeah
Good morning how do you feel?
'Cause I'm ready to dive in 
I'm ready to dive in yeah

There are not many times when I feel like flying, but when I do, it's because I'm filled with a sense of freedom that I can allow myself to feel when I need to.  Absolute freedom.  Absolute peace of mind.  Gees, those are things we take for granted when we focus on negative aspects of our lives.  Are you able to check on people and how they are feeling?  When people have asked me how I feel and want to know about my feelings, it's always been a difficult thing to try and explain.  It's not because I'm worried that they would know how I feel, but whether they would be able to understand and whether they want to see themselves in relation to those feelings.  I think about how I feel affects how someone feels about me.  You might think it's unrelated, but my experience tells me that when someone is asking how you are feeling, they are really asking, how does spending time with me, make you feel?  Sometimes I just wish people would be straight forward and ask that.  They just need to tell you if they're ready to dive in.  But easier said than done right?

This champagne's overdue
I can't help myself yeah
One thing I wanna do
Is get closer to you
Closer to you, closer closer

I hope that you find time to let loose and let your hair down.  It's important to learn how to get closer to people, especially people who make you feel good and make you feel good to be alive, to be as much of your authentic and genuine self as possible.  There are so many nights where I have been lucky enough to spend time with people who are a real joy to be around.  Those nights have varied from musical events to just great conversations about the discoveries of life and their inner universe.  I hope that people find the courage to learn more about themselves through the eyes of others, just to gain some other perspectives, but not so much that they start to rely on it and forget their own self worth.  This is one of the few blogposts that I have written smiling throughout the entire writing of it.  I must also say, it's one of the few blogposts that I have been able to write from beginning to end in one sitting without labouring over it too much.  Must be a sign that I'm going to start to ce-ce-ce-celebrate (closer closer). . . . 

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