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Be my joker. . .

How come every guy that I'm loving
Is soon to disappoint, always frightened
They will never hear when I need him
But you come here right when I'm bleeding

I guess it comes back to what you invest in with these guys that you keep falling for, these guys who can't give you what you are crying out for.  Are there things that you have set into motion that they aren't prepared to give?  Granted you can't have an answer for everything, a reason for why you do the things you do, sometimes you just do things because it feels right more than whether it is right.  You might like someone because of the way they make you feel but nothing really adds up to anything meaningful or long-term for the long haul.  Instead, you just enjoy the moments for what they are and not worry too much about the future, not worry too much about what is to come because we never really know what tomorrow brings.  Maybe you do this to protect yourself, so that when you get disappointed, how do you prepare for someone who comes along that you didn't count on arriving?

I was hurt when you found me
Walls so high you ain't ever getting by
But then you broke me
And now I've let you in

When someone new comes into the picture and encourages you to let your guard down, you don't know if you should.  They might even know that you are letting your guard down or don't know how high those walls are.  Moments, where those walls break down, may come about as a result of you being strong enough to really see yourself in your broken state.  Someone might come along who doesn't know your backstory or your history and help you to see things from a different perspective.  They might help you to get rid of hangups that you had about yourself and what you saw in yourself as flaws are actually traits that others rarely have or are too proud to show.  When you let someone in again, you are always wary and cautious about whether you will be hurt again.  You are unsure about whether you can trust yourself to love again and not worry about being broken.  You just can't tell.

Ride or die
I'm Harley Quinn, be my joker
I'm Harley Quinn, be my joker
My ride or die
I'm Harley Quinn, be my joker
I'm Harley Quinn, be my joker

How do you tell someone that you are prepared to follow them to the ends of the earth?  Are you prepared to offer such devotion and loyalty to someone?  I guess the difficult thing would be if you weren't sure about if they felt as strongly about you as you do about them.  Nothing worse than unrequited love right?  It is a tough thing to not be able to articulate your feelings for various reasons.  But the thing about love is that sometimes reason doesn't fall into it as simple or as logically as we would like.  You might have been with the most unsuitable person in the world, in the eyes of the world, but together you make perfect sense.  Nobody really understands what it means to have a ride or die, someone who will be with you and support you no matter what happens to you.


You're a bad boy but you're good to me
Just wanna be your distraction
Gangster, cowboy in the sheets
Give me all your attention

People will often hide their true selves from the world.  Why wouldn't they?  There are too many harsh critics out there, people waiting to tear you down.  Is it any wonder that they would rather play the role that society would rather believe that they are, rather than who they see in the mirror?  And of course, over time, their own view of themselves erodes too and they second guess everything they've done.  How do we reassure the bad boys that we know that they don't need to be what society wants for them?  That if they can just channel that bad boy image into just doing all of the right things in badass ways - is that not the same thing?  I guess a real bad boy is just someone who doesn't follow society's norms, just someone who walks to the beat of their own drum.

Can you see my pulse right now?
Can you feel my heartbeat right now?
Can you hear this beat right now?
Beat right now, beat right now

Do you see a pulse?  Feel a heartbeat?  Hear a beat?  They might be further away or closer than you think.  Depends on whose pulse or heartbeat you are listening to.  When you know you can make someone's heart beat fast, or make their pulse beat fast how does that make you feel?  There may be a whole range of emotions, a whole gamut of emotions that roll around inside you like a roller coaster and you probably don't know what to make of it all.  If you know what you should do or how you should act, the main thing is that you cherish what they give you, in however many ways, small or large.  When people's pulses and heartbeats can beat strong again and you can witness that, then it is a good thing.  They might have shut out any possibility of feeling alive again in this way. 

Ride or die
Like Harley Quinn, you're my joker
Like Harley Quinn, you're my joker
My ride or die
Like Harley Quinn, you're my joker
Like Harley Quinn, you're my joker

I hope that you find your joker.  Whatever barriers we put in place to keep safe because we are still frightened of truly letting go and allowing our pulses to be heard and our heartbeats to be felt, only you will know how much of yourself to reveal.  It is always good to be able to have someone to share funny (perhaps even maniacal?) moments with that are worth remembering.  Having moments like that are priceless because you don't know what tomorrow brings.  We are never promised tomorrow.  We can only live for today and just enjoy what we have with who we are with.  I've only just heard this song and its simple arrangement with the constant piano accompaniment that builds as you reach the final chorus with the subtle background harmonies and strings, it is that lone cello that pierces through that speaks most to me. Turn to that someone today and ask them, "Will you be my joker". . . 

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