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He was beautiful. . .

He was beautiful, beautiful to my eyes
From the moment I saw him sun filled the skies

My first experience with this song was with the original Cavatina but in piano score.  I had gone through a phase during high school where I was sight reading piano music with such a voracious appetite that the public library staff recognised me from all of the trips carting books back and forth.  I would take the books home and play them to death.  The pieces that I ended up liking I would photocopy and put them into folders so that I could play them over and over like reading my favourite books.  Cavatina is one of those pieces that I can play from memory because of this process.  I was familiar with Cleo Laine's work as a child from having seen her featured in a couple of commercials and hearing her voice.  She wrote the lyrics to this song and I have included her video below with John Williams.  When I heard these lyrics, it added another dimension that I appreciated.

He was so so beautiful, beautiful just to hold
In my dreams he was my springtime, winter was cold

Who is the beautiful one in your life?  The way that Cleo sings alongside the melody gives the illusion that it is simplistic and easy to follow, but it can be difficult to maintain uniformity when you are singing in parallel to instrumental accompaniment.  There is a chance that there are slight discrepancies in timing but as with many great performances, these cease to exist as the guitarist and singer become more aligned as the performance progresses.  The thing I like most about the lyrics in songs is how they can evoke word painting and how the selection of words fit the overall pitch placement of the melody.  What also adds to the interpretation of the performance, particularly in this song is the way in which the singer and guitarist work together to maintain the steady pace of the song.


How could I tell him what I so clearly could see?
Though I longed for him, another trusted me completely so I never could be free

(Guitar interlude)

Musically this is my favourite part of the song, because of the change in melody and how it sweeps you away.  You can feel the tension in the spiking of the high pitch on "how" and the lingering on "him".  I like the way the guitar stops at the end of the line to allow the voice to articulate the melody and the rhythm of the words tumbling out of her mouth like water trying to escape a dam.  Are you ever really free anyway?  We are beholden to people either through obligation and necessity (probably more so for them than you) or we would like to be beholden to others (at our own expense, time and otherwise).  How do you tell someone what is so clear to you, but completely obscured from view for them?  I guess you will never really know how to explain things sometimes because if they were meant to see it then they would have in the first place right?

Aah but it was beautiful, knowing now that he cared
I will always remember moments we shared

People may reveal to you different levels of understanding you over a period of time.  The time it takes to discover this may present themselves in situations or conversations that they create to show you, or just randomly (or fate, if you're that way inclined).  Someone I was connected to a very long time ago, still keeps in touch.  The thing about people from your past is that you either see them with a sepia-tinted view or you become confronted with the cold harsh reality of who they have become.  At one point he cared and probably was beautiful.  Now, I don't know what to think.  All you have to go on is memories that you shared and that's ok.  Sometimes memories are like those photo mementoes that you bring out from time to time to look at, pore over, relive for a little while, then put back when you have to face your own reality of responsibilities and obligations.



Now it's all over still the feelings linger on
For my dream keeps returning, now that he's gone

I laugh.  The behaviour that they exhibit back then, they still do so now.  When you think you've grown out of those childish ways, they continue to be perpetuated in the present day, but only because there is room afforded for it to continue to exist.  What feelings do you have that linger on?  Do you think those feelings aren't even real, but rather they are residual because there has been no closure?  What dream keeps returning for you?  I think for me with each passing day, the dream changes.  The dream of a life that I am building because there are people no longer in this dream that I thought I would be living.  The ones who are permanently gone are the hardest people to live without.  You have no real choice about the matter, do you?



For it was beautiful, beautiful, beautiful to be loved

I hope that whatever you are going through in life, that you have opportunities to be loved.  There are times where we can only grasp it in small bursts because people may not be willing to give the love that you crave.  You might feel that you are not in a position to love someone the way they want to be loved either.  This give and take that happens in matters of the heart, they are all part and parcel of how we live and love, love to live.  The greatest experiences in your life may come from moments that pure love existed.  You might never have those moments again so to have had them happen at all, is surely a gift and an act of love.  We never really know how much capacity we have to love.  We never really know how deeply others can love us in return.  All I know is that it is a beautiful thing to be loved and to be loved by him who I can no longer hold.  He was beautiful. . . 

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